I recently passed the three year mark at my place of employment. I won't say that its been all good or all bad, but in my experience working here is negative far far more often than it is positive. So today I had a sit down meeting with my boss to discuss where I fit in on the new pay structure. I was looking forward to the meeting as a number of people I work with had received substantial raises ($3 - $4 per hour raises). So imagine my suprise when my boss tells me that while I am still below the average wage that he wants to establish, I will not be receiving a raise at this time. Apparently there is only so much money to go around and I don't warrant any of it. So I left frustrated and angry, wondering why doing everything that is asked of someone and more for three plus years is not enough. My frustration increased when I found out that a coworker who has done cocaine while at work, had sex with coworkers while at work, worked more than one shift drunk and did nothing to stop a client from being assaulted by a gang of individuals was given a raise. So now I sit here wondering why I should do anything at all. Apparently doing your job, showing up on time, working extra hours for no overtime pay matters little to my employer. Its the firable offences that get you ahead here. I can't wait till I'm a teacher and can get out of this hell hole.
*****
Rugby season is almost over. I took a long time in coming to a decision on whether or not I was going to play this year but when I did I committed to the team. I attend ever practice, every game and have taken up running so as to ensure my fitness for an 80 minute game. Of course it didn't take long to realize that I was wasting my time once again. After paying $240 and doing everything that my coaches ask of me, all it really takes to play is showing up to the game. So why do I bust my ass at practice two days a week?
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School is almost here. For me it starts on August 27th. I can't wait for this year to be over so that I can get on with my life and escape this pit that I find myself mired in. Too bad an education wasn't free, I could be so much happier if it was.
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Well I've spent four hours at work and accomplished nothing. I'm still trying to find the motivation to do anything, anything at all.
